she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize