No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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