**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
