If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
so that wasnt chicken after all
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Randomize
