letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
