smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
Randomize