And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Randomize
