...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
Randomize
