I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
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