I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
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