And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Randomize
