you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize