The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
