The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
