And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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