dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
