Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Randomize
