So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
