I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize
