we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did i walk over a car last night?
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
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