My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
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