In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
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