i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Randomize
