so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Need sex. Gaining weight.
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize