You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
