Can Purell be used as lube?
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
