i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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