Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
