I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
We had to coat check the pizza.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize