How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize
