Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
