I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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