high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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