my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Randomize
