he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
How external is "for external use only"?
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
