i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
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