I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
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