fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
just tell him i said nine months
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Randomize