So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
