Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Randomize
