I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
you inspire me to be a worse person
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
