how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Randomize
