what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
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I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
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