no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Randomize
