Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
I've blown a few things in my day
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
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