you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
