I CAN MOONWALK!
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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