After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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