I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Randomize
