New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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