I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
don't judge my taste in strippers
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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